Thursday, April 7, 2011

if one woman driver can give us all a bad name, i might be to blame

I left work today at 4:30.
(like everyday)

I drove through the two small towns to the highway, about 12 miles.
(like always)

( I don't notice right away)

Home is SOUTH.
(I use naughty language out loud)

It is 17 miles to the next ramp.

The next ramp is an EXIT ONLY.
(I start eyeing the median crossovers)

It is another 12 miles to the next ramp.
(I am too chicken to pull into the crossover due to the very large sign telling me its unlawful to do so)

I get off the highway, I get BACK ON THE SOUTHBOUND RAMP.

I drive back the 12 miles to the exit only town,
I drive the 17 miles to the ramp I should have taken.

Silently screaming inside as I see the sign proclaiming 55 miles to home. I drive on, 3 exits to go before I need to get off and get on the town road to home.

I am SO MAD.
I grab my cell phone to call my friend and tell her what a moron I am.
Voice dial said friend (safety first even in times of extreme stupidity).
Ring, ring, ring, voice mail.
I am leaving a HEATED "I can't believe I am THIS stupid" voice mail WHEN I DRIVE PAST MY FREAKING EXIT TO THE TOWN ROAD TO HOME.

I start to cry.

I look at the median crossovers, you know the U Turn places in the median where cops hang out to bust speeders?
I start to view them as the link back to sanity.
I go past 3 trying to work up the nerve.
F it, I switch lanes, slow down and bust a Uey speeding into the other lane of traffic like a madwoman.

I get to my exit, I take my exit. I get onto the town road and begin the drive home. I feel dirty.

Its still a 1.5 hour drive home.

It's 5:30.
I cry because I know my kids will be eating Chef Boyarde for dinner at 7:30. I worry that my 2 year old will hate me when I pick her up from daycare at 7 instead of 6 and my 12 year old will be worried I am dead on the side of the road somewhere. I debate calling everyone I know to tell them I am not dead, but am in fact a raving lunatic who apparently can't drive and think at the same time.



Stephanie said...

Don't feel bad - I bet most of us have done that at one time or another......I know I have, without the added stress of 2 kids at home. There are some long stretches on that road between exits, but what I can't figure out is where you drove 12 miles to get to the highway, unless you weren't at work. It's only about 2 miles from there.

Sara said...

Ok, not to be mean but that was kinda funny..... sorry it worked out like this but it gave me a good laugh....... :) and you know that I love you.

Siobhan aka Kiwivandal said...

@Sara: It was funny after, just not at the time :)
@Stephanie: I was at work, it's about 12 miles to the exit, I go to the #9 exit and then down to Montpelier...

Suetopia said...

I keep telling you to go to exit 10. You will save yourself a lot of time and aggravation. I'm sorry you had that experience. It is a lousy way to end a day. I've done it myself. Just know that if you do get on the interstate and go past Montpelier, you can get off at the next exit in Barre and still get home in the same time. Let me get some directions to you so you don't have to lose time again.

Emily said...

I've done this before... I think many of us have. Based on what you had gone through, I definitely would have.