I have no idea how many parts this story is going to have, and just to clarify this is the story of me and my people and my life so far. My memories, however scattered, and the great joy and terrible beauty my life has brought me. It may also contain great sorrow and pain, but life is like that sometimes.
There was a moment, a terrifyingly LONG moment when I was a child, around 8 I think, when I got into my bed and sitting on my pillow was the most GIGANTIC grey spider I had ever seen in my life.
I had never really been fond of spiders, it's something about their long spindly legs, like they could reach out and grab up my whole existence with them. The house I lived in then had a circular driveway, and a little front porch that was literally crawling with the beasts.
I had never really been up close to a spider before that (that I remember anyway). Upon arriving home on any given summery afternoon I would make sure I had a tight grip on my items and a clear path to the door and I would run full tilt, head down into the door and pry it open as fast as possible to get into the house. Safely inside the front hall I would go about my business of getting an afternoon snack or whatever was on the docket for the afternoon. Never thinking about them again, until that day.
That day my brain decided it would think that there was NOTHING more scary in this whole wide universe than a spider. It would decide to fill me with dread even thinking about them. It would take a very long time to get to sleep that night, and for many nights after.
As the years wore on, I would learn to tolerate the eight legged freaks so long as they stayed at a distance, never moving. When the little came along, the hubbs said "You better learn not to screech like a banshee or your kids are going to be scared of them too". I have tried, believe me friends, I have TRIED. For the hubbs, for the kids, but sometimes, the fear gets the better of me.